Of Monkeys, Keyboards and The Introvoys

The infinite monkey theorem states that "a monkey hitting keys at random on a typewriter keyboard for an infinite amount of time will almost surely type a given text, such as the complete works of William Shakespeare". While many sophisticated thinkers have applied this to such diverse fields of study such as evolution, literary theory, and the statistical mechanics of random number generation, less gifted thinkers such as myself have appropriated this to the study of a single phenomenon: the Introvoys.

This band, which reached its zenith in the early '90s, is responsible for the hit singles "However Which Way" and "Will I Survive". Infuriatingly, both these songs, despite the normally high standards of eclectic excellence that I apply to my music, are firmly ensconced in my iTunes library.



Truly, songs are more than their lyrics. Otherwise, how could an otherwise well-educated, discriminating former Literature teacher put up with gems such as:

Try to close your eyes
And listen to the waves of young
Can you hear my voice I'm calling
Hear the sound

I can't go on forever all alone
I am only human
And my heart's not stone

"Will I Survive"? No. "However Which Way." "But, did I survive?" Barely.

Yet, there is the music itself. I wouldn't characterize it as particularly deep or complex, but it is compelling. The melody is catchy, and there is the judicious use of the guitars and drums to stress different movements throughout the song. You listen to the song and you figure, "Hey, this isn't bad." More importantly, you listen to the song and say, "Hey, I can write something like this!"

It reminds me of some pick-up basketball players that I've known in my youth. These players master a small set of effective moves which allow them to impose their will on the game. But these moves aren't borne of preternatural athleticism, or a studied grace. They are crude, somewhat awkward-looking improvisations of moves they've seen elsewhere. You admire how effective these moves are, but you are also just a little bit annoyed at the injustice of it all. "If I didn't care about aesthetics, I'd develop an ugly leaning set shot like that too!"

There's a part of me that recoils whenever I listen to "However Which Way" and "Will I Survive", but when I set aside my pretensions to musical sophistication, I must admit that these songs are catchy and, ultimately, memorable.

The Introvoys are the ugly leaning set shot of my iTunes library. Enjoy!