Acquired Tastes: The Way Of The John-D

I will never truly go on the record as being a child of the '80s and '90s, but I will go as far as expressing a more than academic interest in the popular culture commonly associated with that time frame. Following that vein, is there anyone who represents the '80s and '90s as completely as Patrick Swayze? Swayze either starred in, or played a pivotal role onscreen for the following movies: Youngblood, Dirty Dancing, Road House, and Ghost. Doesn't anyone find it even remotely interesting that Swayze, following an improbably glorious run of finding work in the aforementioned popular cult classics, simply vanished off the face of the planet after 1991?

Patrick Swayze is an interesting enough pop culture phenomenon to at least nudge the A.V. Club to begin an autopsy, er, inquiry into, if not his whereabouts, then his influence on the generation he meant the most to.

Noel Murray writes:

For a good long stretch in the late '80s and early '90s, Patrick Swayze was the go-to guy for Hollywood casting agents looking for a rugged action hero with heart and soul—deep, but not too deep. Whole websites and mini-cults have sprung up around Swayze's Road House character, a philosophy major with a Zen-like understanding of when to fight and when to "be nice." But Road House is just one tile in Swayze's mosaic of manhood. Below are some key quotes that outline how anyone can become the dancin'-est, truckin'-est, surfin'-est tough guy on the block. How to be, in essence, "The Swayze."


If only there was a need for the emergence of a thoughtful, mildly amusing, endearing, philosophically-inclined, but fundamentally happy teacher with abs that were used in the Spartan movie, 300, and the widest repertoire of cheesy power ballads from the '80s, '90s, and beyond: to wit, "The John-D". Now wouldn't that be an improvement on "The Swayze"? I'm thinking of turning off the comments for this particular post, by my faith in humanity prevents me from doing so. Any thoughts?

Picture of Patrick Swayze from Point Break comes courtesy of A.V. Club

Picture of Yours Truly need not be credited, because The John-D need only answer to himself.